their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
You are a genius and a whore.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize
