wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize