Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
