i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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