Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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