Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
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