I wish I could punch you in the face.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
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