Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Randomize
