I don't think brook has ever known best
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
And then my night got REAL pukey
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
