You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Randomize
