I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize