Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
We had to coat check the pizza.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize