Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
