i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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