Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
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