Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Randomize
