fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
