You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
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