So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
