Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
try to milk me bitch
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
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