And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Randomize
