how can u be prego again
I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
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