Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
she pinky promised me she was 18
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
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