So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
