Why does Corona taste like a burp?
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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