the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize
