So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
