Texts From Last Night

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  (773): View more from Illinois

  I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.

  (1-773): View more from Illinois

  Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.

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  (773): I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend. (1-773): Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you. http://tfl.nu/z52z
  Replies (28) Good night (835) Bad night (2693)
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job

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  (616): hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job http://tfl.nu/32u0
  Replies (16) Good night (1196) Bad night (3089)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids

  (979): View more from Texas

  Ahaha, good shit

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  (713): Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids (979): Ahaha, good shit http://tfl.nu/p3kk
  Replies (14) Good night (3504) Bad night (1515)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.

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  (815): Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight. http://tfl.nu/jud2
  Replies (14) Good night (5129) Bad night (723)
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  (409): View more from Texas

  There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.

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  (409): There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit. http://tfl.nu/49qn
  Replies (3) Good night (763) Bad night (2585)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.

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  (207): I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs. http://tfl.nu/5epb
  Replies (10) Good night (3994) Bad night (1737)
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.

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  (901): at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby. http://tfl.nu/xhbt
  Replies (8) Good night (947) Bad night (3314)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Now have a vodka water and get your shit together

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  (612): Now have a vodka water and get your shit together http://tfl.nu/ex6u
  Replies (6) Good night (2508) Bad night (996)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.

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  (205): This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life. http://tfl.nu/uwhu
  Replies (3) Good night (785) Bad night (2046)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Stop drinking before 5

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Easier said than done

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  (651): Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies (612): Stop drinking before 5 (651): Easier said than done http://tfl.nu/j7cm
  Replies (3) Good night (1495) Bad night (779)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.

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  (907): Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig. http://tfl.nu/jc5y
  Replies (6) Good night (1048) Bad night (964)
• Favorite

  (251): View more from Alabama

  my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.

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  (251): my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car. http://tfl.nu/1aw9
  Replies (2) Good night (465) Bad night (668)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.

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  (303): I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night. http://tfl.nu/4kzv
  Replies (1) Good night (592) Bad night (303)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.

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  (904): Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here. http://tfl.nu/5mlv
  Replies (1) Good night (488) Bad night (343)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.

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  (847): It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later. http://tfl.nu/lbnp
  Replies (0) Good night (584) Bad night (287)

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