Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
