do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
this hospital has no fireball
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize