I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
