Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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