his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
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