is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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