16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
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