They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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