To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
