he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
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he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
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do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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