He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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