This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
