I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
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