your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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