I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
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