just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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