I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
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