I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
