also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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