Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Randomize
