He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Randomize
