I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
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