I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
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